You Can’t Just Walk Around Masturbating in Public, Swedish People | VICE United States

Last week, the Swedish newspaper Mitt i Stockholm reported on a sexual assault case brought against a 65-year-old man who had been seen touching himself on a local beach. Weirdly, he’d been acquitted because “the masturbation wasn’t directed or aimed at any specific person.” No one seems to know what the man was looking at while he pumped away at his groin—the horizon? An empty boat? A gull—but nevertheless, over the weekend, the story started to ooze its way out to international media outlets.

When the English-language Swedish news website the Local picked up the story, however, something was lost in translation—they messed up one of the quotes given to Mitt i Stockholm by the case’s wonderfully named public prosecutor, Olof Vrethammar.

#meanwhile #criminals

I eat healthy stuff, probably way more than I should because sometimes around lunch I dream of sitting in some little cafe eating a fat cheeseburger (with onions and pickles) made just for me with greasy french fries, ketchup, mustard, the whole bit. I can even smell the ketchup and mustard right now. And there’s like 10 napkins wadded up on the counter and two Coke cans because I was really thirsty.

When I’m done I’d go outside and the sky is blue and the air is crisp and I go to like the hardware store or K-mart and then maybe stop by the ice cream shop for a thick chocolate shake. Nothing to heavy because I gorged myself an hour ago..

Okay.. Daydream is over so I’m gonna go back to eating my microwaved tofu and black beans here at my desk that I’ve been sitting at for almost 7 years now.

#confessional #foodies

If you’ve followed along on tcrbang.com over the few years or so, you’ve probably noticed that I have a love/hate/love/hate relationship with it, even more so over the last year. It’s a online journal of interests, emotions, activities, dramas, high-points and low-points and every where in between.

It’s hard for me to look at it because it takes me back to different times, different eras. So much has changed physically and internally. Memories can be a real jerk.

#tcr #confessional

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Anonymous posting is gone because of the spam bots.

#tcr

OMG. The garage in the downstairs office is blaring the Scorpions’ No One Like You. Sometimes I just wanna turn wrenches and roll tires for a living.

#musicvideos #thescorpions

There was a smell overwhelming the basement, like death warmed up and cooled down in a 70s electric oven. The mystery was a half-decomposed rabbit outside in the basement window well that I just had the dis-pleasure of removing.

The stench won’t leave my nose. I snorted soapy water with no luck. Maybe bleach? God, this is horrific all the way down to the 9th circle of Dante’s Hell.

I don’t know what sick, twisted karmic torture this is, but Universe we are EVEN now.

#confessional

Screenshots of Despair

This is a poem I found on the internet. Click Random to see more despair.

When I forget what I was doing at work, I just head over here.

#funnies

“Paste From Word Now Available” — ❤️ it.

#random #worknews

So I’m driving home and an elderly woman and I get to the stop sign at the same time. I absent-mindedly motion for her to go ahead. And as she’s turning through intersection she turns and looks directly at me, joyfully waving with a huge smile on her face, happy as any clam.

That my friends is one of the true keys to happiness: doing something simple for somebody else without your personal needs getting in the way.

Be a better person, it will delight your spirit.

#protip #advancedsoul