I think they’re having a meeting.

😅

T: My FB keeps f’ing up and I don’t know why. I am still all good, but I am going crazy. Not a long trip. Haven’t been this crazy so often in a long time.
I had to take a call from a patient last night:
Patient: I was in there today. They gave me a Monitor to take home. They told me “NOT to use a cell phone while I was using the Monitor.” My question for you is, “Can I use my phone for my alarm?”
Me: After mulling it over for 3 seconds, “Yeah, Go ahead and use it for your alarm.”
Patient: Can I use it for the radio?
Me: (They told you not to use the phone and you’re calling me to ask how many exceptions there are to this policy?)
What I really said is, “Well, what did they tell you again?”
There ought to be a criminal penalty for stupid questions. Whoever said there are no stupid questions has never been asked. “Should I put that fire out?”

I’m completely with ya.

We should really be given licenses from the state, federal, and international gov’mints to bullwhip the morons.

lol

Clarice: “If you didn’t kill him then who did, sir?”
H: “Who can say? Best thing for him, really. His therapy was going nowhere.”

Clarice: “That doesn’t interest me, Dr. Frankly, it’s the kind of thing Miggs would say.”
H: “Not anymore.”

Myocardial Infarction. Later today they gonna stick a camera up through my goddam groin, just to see if there’s anything they like! Lonely are the turds, T, lonely are the turds. Never smoked tobacco, I’m thin, I rarely fuck the livestock anymore; I Do Not Deserve this! On the sunny side of the street, I can have as much morphine as I want! Which is an unusual concept…when you think about it. I repeated their statement, “As much as I want?!”. Will be in touch. Gonna have EORR send you some pix. I have so goddam many “lines” hanging out of my needle holes I can get Chinese TV! You don’t want a heart attack. No you don’t!

You had a heart attack???

Yeppers. If you can avoid it, do! They ain’t no goddam fun! I got tubes hangin’ out 116 places. They had to do an angioplasty prior to the placement of 2 stents in my goddam heart! Went through my groin! Ain’t near as much fun as it sounds! More later😬

Ya, I imagine it’s not fun in the least. Speedy recovery!! What caused it?

STRONG Family history is the main culprit. Both grandfathers, dad (with extenuating circumstances) 4 of my 5 brothers. Eating red meat is the only other thing that could possibly be it but I don’t eat anything like some people do. I’m very slightly over weight. When they discharged me they said “red meat no more than 5 meals a week”. That would be an increase for me. I eat fish or chicken most days I eat meat. Steak no more than 4 or 5 times a year. Hamburger 4 or maybe 5 times a week.
I haven’t eaten meat since the day before the heart attack. Purposely. The day before the heart attack I ate chicken. I am surprised as anyone.

All about the genes and meat, huh? I never figured red meat to be such a bad dude.

Red Meat is REDRUM! No shit. It is the worst of the modifiable behaviors. Mine is mostly the family history but the red meat is the worst. People shouldn’t eat it. At least not like we do. 4 or 5 times a year is a good number. That way it’s a treat and something you can look forward to. No hamburgers. I’m gonna try to start the tofu thing. Life, huh?
Oh! And red wine? Turns out it’s good for you, in moderation. WHATEVER THE FUCK THAT MEANS!? MODERATION SCHMODERATION.

Be wary of tofu — it’s real easy to do completely wrong.