can you dig it?

i have been to more matinee by myself, with half pint and fortified by a pocketful'o'gorilla tranquilizers, than i can count.

memorably, one time here in the village. i can't remember, but i think i got called off work, so i went to the show, and gulped down a handful a hydrocodone/tramadol/lorazepam. i think i had vodka, and i know i drank it in 2 swigs.
i almost passed out. i slowly slid down in the chair and was aware that the movie was over because the kids were coming by to clean up the popcorn and staring at me.

sadly, there were few if any repercussions and i did the same thing the next time.

i had 'em trained at the theater at the last village. if i was "asleep" at the end of the movie they just let me sleep unless there was another show starting. sometimes they called e. to come get me. i just told her i was tired from working nights all the time. denial is deep and strong.

they never so much as looked at me funny. i was doing well financially at the time and often went to a movie everyday. at least every other day. sometimes i drank terpinhydrate cough syrup and left the bottles in the theater. i think they may have been trying to tell me to stop it because the next time i went the codeine bottles were lying on top of the trash bin, very obviously. keep in mind that these were quite often weekday matinees that i was the only one in attendance.

this one little girl who worked there felt sorry for me and i know i wasn't' the creep or the lech because i asked her to help e. with housework (a paid job) and she was eager to take it. she brought her boyfriend and they loved us. i don't know but i guess we paid 'em well. e. was in charge of the payroll.
the same kid had a broken leg when my rented car wouldn't start so she gave me a jump start. she walked out in the snow on crutches to help me and i tipped her and was always super nice to her. i left reviews and always said she was the best and they should pay her more and stuff.

i'm glad i was decent to her because sometimes when i have been in a blackout i have been known to be the creep with the women. i used to get it in my head that they needed my love. as soon as someone would shove me away i was always able to discern that there was something wrong with her girl parts, and i should go find a one handed magazine.

it's crazy because i'm pathologically shy when sober. i had to be in sobriety and working on my soul to be able to actually appropriately approach and propose something halfway unoffensive to humanity.
imagine a dexedrine laced whiskey aroma coming off a 6ft tall 100 lb white boy with an afro whose idea of foreplay was cooing something romantic like, "you corn hole on the first date? BRACE YOURSELF!"

"While more than fifty percent of current Internet users are in companies or organizations, the number of home users is growing rapidly."

This thing could catch on.

I think it has a good chance but I don't really see the point.

Why do I immediately think of Lucifer from the original Battlestar Galactica?

General observations:

1. the back row women are taller than the men
2. the states-man is holding a pony leg in his right hand
3. the hoe-master is not wearing shoes but tucks in shirt
4. the urine-maid is an albino or a ghost