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Jun 6th, 2019 at 11:47:17 am

tcr! · Jun 6, 2019 at 11:47 am

The function/method MUST return the number of bytes written.
Why? I’m really not sure, but it must be done or it throws errors at you till you die.

#devhell

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Developer laments, a Cobain quote, and more!

tcr! · Jan 10, 2019 at 12:46 pm

Being a dork web developer who:

  • loves code
  • is forced to use WordPress to manage a client’s hideous content
  • because the client sends me mangled rich-text emails
  • loves the WP theme devs who hard-code sort columns and orders in their PHP

Well, I guess all of that combined makes me want to punch myself in the face.

#devhell

See also:

“I have a request for our fans. If any of you in any way hate homosexuals, people of different color, or women, please do this one favor for us — leave us the fuck alone! Don’t come to our shows and don’t buy our records.”
Kurt Cobain

While I’m here, I might suggest you watch this ten minute video of Jackson Pollock. He’s one of the few heroes of mine who I could actually pull of his hair style. The cigarette dangling out of his mouth is most appealing.

And finally, as a note, if you jump off the deep end I’m probably not going to follow you.

#advancedsoul

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Phone number optionally required

tcr! · Dec 1, 2018 at 12:05 pm


Phone number optionally required

Good one Google.

🙄 #devhell

2 comments

Mitchell · Dec 1, 2018 at 3:33 pm

Lol

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leebobabaruba · Dec 3, 2018 at 6:44 pm

Would they make up their mind?

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Aug 20th, 2018 at 3:16:17 pm

tcr! · Aug 20, 2018 at 3:16 pm

Writing a valid, functional, and strict MySQL regular expression for latitudes and longitudes is much harder than I thought it would be. Note that I said “MySQL” because they have their own regex engine apparently.

#devhell #mysql

5 comments

keamoose keamoose · Aug 20, 2018 at 3:29 pm

I hope you only have to do it once; look at all of the different versions they had to implement for GNWT!

tcr! tcr! · Aug 20, 2018 at 4:08 pm

What is this devil worship?

keamoose keamoose · Aug 20, 2018 at 4:10 pm

Government + committee + engineers = devil. Actually it works pretty well. https://www.maps.geomatics.gov.nt.ca/HTML5Viewer_Prod/index.html?viewer=ATLAS

tcr! tcr! · Aug 20, 2018 at 5:40 pm

Ah nice! I see that you can search for parcels.

keamoose keamoose · Aug 20, 2018 at 6:43 pm

You can search for more or less anything if you have the right permissions on your login. Like, the property assessment guys can search by the names of homeowners. I can’t imagine what the database must look like. I mostly use it for air photos and land tenure (e.g. to see if an area is owned by the territorial government or by the municipality). It has some nice features; I always feel appreciative of the programmers when I use it. 😊

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Aug 17th, 2018 at 2:30:42 pm

tcr! · Aug 17, 2018 at 2:30 pm

If you use a micro-framework for your code then you get a micro amount of functionality.

#devhell #protip

1 comment

Richard · Aug 18, 2018 at 8:22 am

Ironically this comment sums up this comment.

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reCAPTCHA V1 IS SHUTDOWN

tcr! · Jun 28, 2018 at 11:27 am

reCAPTCHA V1 IS SHUTDOWN

This is why I hate linking to 3rd party libraries. A website that’s been happily chugging along for years now has a broken contact form. Nobody has been able to submit contact requests for who knows how long because the captcha check fails.

See also: CAPTCHAs are stupid →

#devhell

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Downtime, almost 24 hours worth

tcr! · Jan 25, 2018 at 12:42 pm

Orson Welles slow clap

At 7:56 am I wrote on twitter:

Apparently DreamHost needs to rebuild and restore the world when one of their VPSes goes down.

https://app.status.io/pages/incident/…

Yes, I’m cranky when my sites are offline for 12 hours.

The website’s back up and running but I needed to restore the database from one of my backups because DreamHost’s copy hadn’t been updated since yesterday around 1 am and I did mine yesterday at 8:45 pm.

All in all the site was unreachable from yesterday at 9:45 pm until today at 12:15 pm. Central time of course.

This has been the worst failure on their part I’ve seen since signing up in April 2010. Almost 24 hours of downtime is unacceptable.

Not to mention it took their support team 8 hours to reply to the ticket I opened. I finally twitter’ed them last night at 11:45 pm.

If I’m feeling rambunctious I may move the databases somewhere else this weekend. But I just hate doing shit like that anymore.

#devhell

2 comments

keamoose keamoose · Jan 25, 2018 at 2:34 pm

I would think, if one is intending to rebuild the entire world every time there’s a small failure, one would keep up-to-date backups. Of the WORLD.

tcr! tcr! · Jan 25, 2018 at 3:39 pm

You’d think. 🙄

But I have a suspicion that all of their dev budget has gone to Remixer.

https://www.dreamhost.com/website-builder/

The status page I linked to above says they’re still rebuilding the world. Backups are cool and all but if you can’t get them restored in an hour or less then you ain’t shit.

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Dec 19th, 2017 at 1:10:19 pm

tcr! · Dec 19, 2017 at 1:10 pm

//Our catch block will handle any exceptions that are thrown.

Oh. Is that what catches do?

#devhell

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Troubleshooting your bullshit

tcr! · Nov 21, 2017 at 11:40 am

I often inherit projects that morons have previously worked on. I’m tempted to message their personal email accounts whenever I come across a moronic bug that they created.

The email would contain their bug, a quote from the documentation, and a link.

As an example:

Hello Mr. Moron,

Line 547:
$oral_allergy_symptons_unique = array_unique($oral_allergy_symptons);

Note: Note that array_unique() is not intended to work on multi dimensional arrays.

Source: php.net/manual/en/function.array-unique.php

You wasted over an hour of my time this morning troubleshooting your bullshit.

#devhell #fuckingkevin

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CamelCase will always suck

tcr! · Nov 15, 2017 at 2:10 pm

I’m not knocking this guy’s stuff because he was following convention for this project but seriously. This is an actual object method name I just ran across:

$dm_advertisements->GetClickThroughDataForNewsletterEntriesWithAdvertisementForNewsletterEmailBlasts();

If it were me, I’d have named it:

$advertisements_dm->get_clickthroughs_for_emailed_newsletter_entries();

Readability for the win.

#devhell

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