Pretty Badass.

As a municipal engineer, I’m gonna say that swimming in the retention pond is NOT recommended. :P

Speaking of keeping straight faces…

I used to drink the office coffee. But I stopped. On purpose.

Partly because I started limiting myself to one pot of coffee a day and I drink that before I go to work and bring in a to-go cup if I don’t finish it.

Partly because I got sick of being the only one who made it. And making it means that I had to clean up after yesterday’s coffee. And that means walking down the hall to the communal sink. The coffee pot is also ridiculously complicated. One has to touch all the parts with blue arrows.

The Moccamaster pot itself used to sit in our big room after I made coffee since that’s where the majority of us are.

Anyways… I told everyone in the office that I wasn’t going to be drinking coffee at work anymore the day before I stopped. This was an implication that I also wouldn’t be making coffee either.

The next morning Moccamaster was sitting where it always sat but nobody took the initiative to make coffee. Imagine that.

Fearless Leader rolls into work around 9:45 am and heads straight for the Moccamaster as usual. I wait until he fills up his cup and starts to head for his office before I say “that’s probably yesterday’s coffee.” He turns around disgusted and looks at me. Then he turns again and goes into his office. I could barely contain my giggles.

Moccamaster now sits in the kitchen, usually dirty and half full of coffee from god-knows-when.

Like a warm piece of dusty meatloaf.

Mad Max were/are such feel good movies.

Here’s another photo from that same day. I walked a bit closer to the “lake” and it was a regular cold, bubbling spring.

Funny how, when the retention pond fills up, a crowd will soon gather and go swimming.

Who run Barter Town?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hgq4w4dqKsU

Living or owning property in Iowa in ‘93 and ‘08 taught me things happen. I know I am correct about ‘93 but I may be a year or 2 or off considering ‘08.

“Named but not indicted” is a way of fucking with people. St. Louis, one of the original cities included in the American mafia, has a long history of organized crime. I don’t know and have no opinion on if the story is true. The players on the Cardinals have historically played better, based on the statistics of wins and losses.
The Chicago Cubs have historically been involved in abuse of the livestock, based on journalism and hearsay.

I used to play this theme on my guitar when I was in high school. Because I’m dark like that.

This is another good one…

http://newsthump.com/2012/05/10/north-carolina-votes-to-maintain-sanctity-of-cousins-marrying/

Especially…

“Of course, I chose to ignore the bit in Timothy 2:12 which says ‘no woman should have permission to teach’, as I would have had to stay home otherwise.”

Ok, they have to know they’re growing mold. When it’s gone that far, just crap on his chair. If he went DNA on you, he’d know, but it would have to be expensive as hell for him. In the meantime, just completely wear a straight face and say you don’t know what he’s talking about. You could up the ante after the initial wave by crapping on his desk. Or shit in his wastebasket. Never bat an eye and claim innocence and ignorance. Or…my favorite: the difference between ignorance and apathy? I don’t know and I don’t care. My boss keeps her little closet of an office locked, but she leaves the keys dangling in the door handle when she’s there. I thought of just swiping them and throwing them in the dumpster, but I wouldn’t be able to maintain a straight face.

Seems there’s a lot of that goin’ round. This got me.

http://newsthump.com/2015/06/11/australian-couple-to-kill-own-children-if-gays-are-allowed-to-adopt/

Moments later: I only have 30 lives!

You’d think an omnipotent being would be able to guess what show you want to watch. I suspect he’s just being an ass.

It seemed really, really plausible, especially given some of the ones that ARE real.

I do love the hell outta these boys.

It wouldn’t surprise me if the Onion found it out in the trash behind the Arizona State Capitol building in Phoenix.

PS- They got me. I thought it was real when I first saw the headline on another site.

Q must lead the Fire TV Voice Search department. :D