If alcoholism is a disease then why should I apologize for what I’ve done. Plus I think making amends isn’t sincere and the real reason people do a ninth step is for self preservation.

For me my ninth steps usually consist of me doing something uncomfortably nice and selfless for/with the person and opening up a dialogue with them about my character defects and how I was wrong. No “sorry” passes my lips.

I’m in the “I was wrong. How can I make it right?” camp, although I think abolishing “sorry” from our vocabulary is a bit much.
I very much appreciated a couple thoughts towards the end of that writing. The idea that the program of AA is the 12 steps gets overlooked quite a bit in my opinion. Many people say they’ve tried AA, i.e. attended meetings. In my experience, attending meetings was not trying AA. I spent months attending meetings before I worked the steps and I didn’t get sober. In fact, I often stopped at a liquor store on the way home from meetings. No human power can relieve my alcoholism. Simply being in the room with those who are recovering is not sufficient for me. I also agree that my job in AA is to share my experience, how I did it, and not tell others how they should do it.

I was told and have heard more than a few times that it’s best to explain the situation, and then ask for the person’s forgiveness. This puts the result, or power of the action in their hands. I then have to accept the results.

Amend doesn’t mean to apologize, it means to change. You don’t apologize the constitution, you amend it. That is how I was taught and it helped.

Great answer! I have never heard that one but I like it!

That’s awesome.

I always liked the saying that an apology is simply a notice that an amend is coming.

My sponsor said, “If you feel like you’ve skimped on the steps, you have.”

She still watches my every move though…

Haha!

When I was about 10, I named my bike. It was the “Rock Chopper Six”. I don’t know why six was included. No records exist for models one through five. I drove that fucker over many Viet Cong, Germans, wild animals and nuns. I rode it up Sister Rosalia’s ass. In a totally non-sexual but enormously satisfying way. Satisfying for Sister.

I give it a B+ because I’m sick of the dark, sans-color visuals some movies are all about these days.

Plus Captain Kirk was in it. Not actually Kirk but more or less the same character.

Fleet commander’s vehicles…

yeah, that bass

I wish I had Maggie on video last night as she came down the stairs after her shower… “DAD, I HAVE INSTAGRAM”

Touché as they say…

Totally with ya… so long as I don’t go out of my way, they obviously want me to see it.

Thankies! 😊

I’ve done this and talked about it for years. I liked to take a walk. I’m not weird about it: If their drapes are open and it can be seen from the street or walk, it’s fair game. I won’t go in a yard or stand on the hydrant or anything. There are traditions to be upheld.