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Circa 2901

tcr! · Apr 29, 2019 at 2:09 am

Everything up in the air.
Everything fell apart.
Everything turned for the worse.
Including me.

#alcoholism

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No horse blankets

tcr! · Apr 10, 2019 at 9:53 am

No horse blankets

When I got to the place where I couldn’t stand myself anymore, where I didn’t want to be the person I’d always been. And not do the same things I’d always done, I can see now that’s when I had reached the breaking point.

The pain of being me had broken my very soul. Fuck.

It wasn’t the drinking, it wasn’t ever the drugs. It was me. It wasn’t the traffic or the other drivers. It wasn’t other people at all. Well, it was some of those people but when that blanket of denial was pulled back just far enough I could see, when a light came on that cast a clarity almost too bright on what I’d been doing to myself nothing ever looked the same again in the days after.

Thinking back to that moment and all the desperate, frantic pain, tortured to tears, completely sober and sick of being myself, that’s when I turned a corner and walked down a path I’d only heard other people talk about.

And that’s when the spiritual revolution began.

No horse blankets.

#photos #alcoholism #lettherebehope

4 comments

vaughn3 · Apr 10, 2019 at 1:46 pm

Well said

tcr! tcr! · Apr 10, 2019 at 4:47 pm

Thank you!

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glenn.cremer glenn.cremer · Apr 11, 2019 at 12:59 pm

I had never heard it put that way, but well said.

tcr! tcr! · Apr 11, 2019 at 6:59 pm

Thanks ❀️

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Gas station meds

tcr! · Apr 2, 2019 at 8:21 am

Gas station meds

I don’t know how many times I was in a gas station early in the morning, looking for convenience store relief from the fiery hangovers from hell but it was a lot.

Those pills never did a damn thing either… πŸ˜‰

#photos #alcoholism

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Mar 8th, 2019 at 7:43:58 am

tcr! · Mar 8, 2019 at 7:43 am

People don’t come into recovery because they think it’s a good idea.

They come in because they’ve set something on fire and are scared shitless.

#alcoholism

11 comments

Thathawa · Mar 8, 2019 at 8:37 am

Yep.

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DoomedEnterprises · Mar 8, 2019 at 9:22 am

Pyromaniacs Anonymous?

North_South_Side · Mar 8, 2019 at 2:30 pm

911-Step program?

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Just4Today50 · Mar 8, 2019 at 10:24 am

That’s why I did.

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feebleshamwise · Mar 8, 2019 at 11:45 am

It does say “we came to…..” in step 2

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VegasMomofTres · Mar 8, 2019 at 12:45 pm

My life. My life. I set my life on fire.

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OS2REXX · Mar 8, 2019 at 1:02 pm

To quote Jason Mendoza (of the Good Place): “Any time I had a problem, I’d throw a Molotov Cocktail and *BOOM*, right away, I had a different problem!”

sobah_fett · Mar 8, 2019 at 1:12 pm

I’m dying… lol

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sobah_fett · Mar 8, 2019 at 1:13 pm

Not a lot of people riding a hot streak into the rooms

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mr_marble_man · Mar 8, 2019 at 3:08 pm

“…on a winning streak”

That’s the one I’ve heard a lot and like. I clearly remember somebody saying this to me when I was in early recovery and stressed as my messy life situation(’s) were slowly untangling from the web I created during my active alcoholism. At the time those problems seemed unsolvable. Now, many months later, all those “problems” have solved themselves. How about that!

“None of us come into recovery on a winning streak.”

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SOmuch2learn · Mar 8, 2019 at 8:03 pm

Desperation was a gift.

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Feb 20th, 2019 at 9am

tcr! · Feb 20, 2019 at 9:00 am

last one from the drinking era

Today I’ve drawn sober breaths for 7 straight years in a row. πŸŽ‰

The picture is from December 2011, the last one from the drinking era. I never wanted to look at the camera. Pictures have a way of capturing our soul, documenting for future generations. For good or for bad.

Today, I’m sure I don’t smell the same.

I am, however, wearing the same White Sox hoodie this very moment.

And Maggie’s as cute as a weeble-wobble. 😊

#alcoholism

35 comments

pynn · Feb 20, 2019 at 9:04 am

Right on … congrats!

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domo vitek · Feb 20, 2019 at 9:04 am

Congratulations!

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Rich J · Feb 20, 2019 at 9:05 am

Congratulations my friend. Great job.

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Ryan Waters · Feb 20, 2019 at 9:22 am

This is s big one!!!!
Congrats. Thanks for showing me (us) how it’s done with humility and a Grace. I love your message my friend!

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CintrΓ³n · Feb 20, 2019 at 9:24 am

Congratulations sir!

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tism tism · Feb 20, 2019 at 9:25 am

You’re amazing. Congratulations t. :-D

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Raes · Feb 20, 2019 at 9:53 am

Congratulations!

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annekothe annekothe · Feb 20, 2019 at 9:55 am

Congratulations! So happy to be on this journey with you ❀️

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Irene · Feb 20, 2019 at 10:11 am

Congratulations!!! I am so very very proud of you, and I know your family and friends are also… That little bright shining star that is standing by your side has always been there, and what a little doll! Keep up the good work. I’m sure it has been and is very hard. Love you πŸ€—πŸ‘β€οΈπŸŽ‰

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JJ · Feb 20, 2019 at 10:27 am

Wow! You are truly one of my biggest inspirers!!!
Totally rad! 😁

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franh franh · Feb 20, 2019 at 10:40 am

Congrats my friend. Great sharing the journey with you.

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JJania · Feb 20, 2019 at 10:57 am

Sweet!

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chrisrich · Feb 20, 2019 at 11:06 am

thank you for being who you are today!

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Meicher · Feb 20, 2019 at 11:08 am

super sober

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Momma J Momma J · Feb 20, 2019 at 11:12 am

I am so proud of you - congratulations and carry on!

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DeeDee · Feb 20, 2019 at 11:16 am

Congrats!

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Kelly K · Feb 20, 2019 at 11:19 am

Congratulations! It has been a pure joy to walk this journey with you. You are an inspiration.

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LAW · Feb 20, 2019 at 11:24 am

Congratulations!

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Monohon · Feb 20, 2019 at 11:25 am

Congrats my man!

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Sammons · Feb 20, 2019 at 1:00 pm

I’m very proud of you! Congratulations!!!

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marney0160 marney0160 · Feb 20, 2019 at 1:02 pm

Congrats!

high five elves

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PM Veronica · Feb 20, 2019 at 1:31 pm

Awesome. Congrats!! πŸ’ͺ🏼πŸ’ͺ🏼

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Clarke J · Feb 20, 2019 at 1:34 pm

Congratulations!

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Kris · Feb 20, 2019 at 1:38 pm

Awesome

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Howell · Feb 20, 2019 at 2:55 pm

Done drinking myself!

tcr! tcr! · Feb 20, 2019 at 4:55 pm

Nice!

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tcr! tcr! · Feb 20, 2019 at 4:54 pm

For reference here’s my front yard today. The right fence corner is no longer visible with the little bushes taking over. The left has more trees and a rose bush. Maggie’s swing is long gone. Cars have came and went.

Change is inevitable but more importantly, growth doesn’t happened over night. It takes time, sunshine, and fresh air. Inside and out.

I’m grateful for all of you, who stand in the sunlight with me. β˜€οΈ I wouldn’t be able to make the journey alone.

my front yard today

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threecrates threecrates · Feb 20, 2019 at 5:03 pm

❀️❀️❀️!! Congrats. And thank you.

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vaughn3 · Feb 20, 2019 at 5:19 pm

Yay! Congratulations

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prokop · Feb 20, 2019 at 5:56 pm

Congrats.

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jenkins_arts · Feb 20, 2019 at 6:14 pm

Congratulations!!!

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Mona · Feb 20, 2019 at 8:34 pm

Congratulations!

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Picottes · Feb 20, 2019 at 9:48 pm

Proud of you!

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glenn.cremer glenn.cremer · Feb 20, 2019 at 10:32 pm

I’m very proud of you. Love, Dad

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heylinda heylinda · Feb 21, 2019 at 8:05 am

This is the best thing I’ve read in a long time

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A bunch of bills and checks to write

tcr! · Feb 3, 2019 at 9:15 am

Card catalog featuring Finland to Fossil

When I was newly sober, having a list of amends to make was like having a big pile of bills to pay. And I hate that feeling: a stack of checks to write and a list of people and places I owe. It’s just always on my mind, lingering in the back row like somebody murmuring behind you at the movies. When I stopped drinking my conscious woke up and I start hearing the voices of remorse.

And then there was that one time when I was in high school that I stole a whole bunch of books from the public library. It was way back when shoplifting was easy. Go in with a nearly empty backpack, load it up with Hobbit adventures, and walk out. Just be careful and it was really that easy. I didn’t feel any guilt at the time because for whatever reason in my head, the world owed me.

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Jan 12th, 2019 at 6:06:44 pm

tcr! · Jan 12, 2019 at 6:06 pm

I’m going to speaking at the Geneva Open tonight. You should come if you got nothing going on. Yeah, it’s been snowing but are we mice or men? Or women? I’m too old to keep up with any other 2019 genders.

In any account, this is an open meeting so that means that public folk are welcome. No, you won’t have to talk or say anything.

8pm at the United Methodist Church on Hamilton and 2nd in Geneva.

#lettherebehope #alcoholism

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Never, ever, been to jail…

tcr! · Oct 9, 2018 at 4:16 pm

Never ever been to jail - MP4

#videos #truckthoughts #alcoholism

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The case of the conspicuous lawn furniture

tcr! · Oct 2, 2018 at 4:36 pm

Audio (MP3): 20181002 - The case of the conspicuous lawn furniture

One time when I was drinking I put a lawn chair in the middle of the yard that runs along the side of my house. My thought was that it’d be the perfect spot to keep tabs on the neighbors from a slightly covert location.

A couple days later when I was sober I remembered the lawn chair and returned it to the back deck. I felt somewhat embarrassed afterward as it was a somewhat embarrassing place to have lawn furniture. Sitting shamefully in the grass along the side of the house.

If you ever see a guy sitting in a lawnchair in his side yard, it would be safe to assume he’s drunk.

#alcoholism #homeimprovement #diariespodcast

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Sep 23rd, 2018 at 9:23:11 am

tcr! · Sep 23, 2018 at 9:23 am

Peeps, I’m going to be speaking at the boathouse in about half an hour if you got nothing going on.

I know it’s Sunday and it’s early but it’s sunny nonetheless!

πŸŒžβ˜•οΈ #alcoholism #goteam

3 comments

domo vitek · Sep 23, 2018 at 1:53 pm

You were great!

tcr! tcr! · Sep 23, 2018 at 2:46 pm

Thank you!!

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Momma J Momma J · Sep 23, 2018 at 4:19 pm

It’s so wonderful of you to share your learning experiences! You are unique!

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