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Ebonies and Ivories

tcr! · Jan 18, 2019 at 8:42 pm

Ebonies and ivories Camels and Kools

Camels and Kools, too.

#photos #pianos #smokersunite

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No smoking at the entryways, peeps

tcr! · Aug 30, 2018 at 9:42 am

Audio (MP3): 20180830 - No smoking at the entryways, peeps

And then there was that one time a few years back when I was standing at the front door of the work building. It was a cool autumn day and I was enjoying a beautiful cigarette.

Enjoying the smoke, the solitude, and the cars going by.

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2 comments

Momma J Momma J · Aug 30, 2018 at 10:05 am

Look for the good in people!

tcr! tcr! · Aug 30, 2018 at 10:55 am

Yep. I try to assume the best in life.

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Like I’m going to fall over

tcr! · Apr 17, 2018 at 7:26 pm

Audio (MP3): 20180417 - Like I'm going to fall over

I haven’t been writing as much because I’ve been struggling with my nicotine addiction. All sorts of things happen and don’t happen when I try to quit.

Sometimes I’ll spout off something about quitting on social media or whatever but lately I’ve just been keeping my struggles to myself. Because unless somebody was a daily smoker for over 30 years, they don’t really get it. I know people are trying to help but move along. Sometimes we just need to vent.

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Apr 4th, 2018 at 4:43:36 pm

tcr! · Apr 4, 2018 at 4:43 pm

Lady, I realize you but a lowly Walgreens cashier but I haven’t had any nicotine gum in almost 3 hours and I will TURN THIS STORE UPSIDE DOWN if you don’t show me some hustle.

#smokersunite

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Apr 2nd, 2018 at 2:50:04 pm

tcr! · Apr 2, 2018 at 2:50 pm

Do you ever think that smoking a cigarette would be a good idea?

I thought so.

#smokersunite

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Communal cigarette larceny

tcr! · Feb 21, 2018 at 1:18 pm

Audio (MP3): 20180221 - Communal cigarette larceny

So one time when I was “quit smoking” I was headed up to see my dentist in Elgin. Don’t ask me for a referral. He’s long since retired and is probably off riding a mule in the Grand Canyon these days.

He actually rode a mule there once. A mule by the name of Travis. I heard that story every time I went to see him.

Anyway, whatever stop smoking aid I was using that day wasn’t working. I had a little panic attack and that quickly turned into full blown, terror frenzy.

I stopped and charged into the nearest gas station, drooling at the mouth, doing sign language, knocking over kids and racks of maps. After I got a pack of cigarettes in my hands, I tore into them like a bear after honey, ripping open a beehive regardless of consequences.[1]

I had one in my mouth before even getting outside the gas station. I lit one up in the cool Autumn air and felt the fabulous serenity now. The world made sense. The radio station tuned in. I was a little light headed but the pleasure sensors were firing on all 12 cylinders.

A few minutes later as the smoking cigarette was winding down, the self-disgust was winding up. That “smoking again” love/hate kinda thing. Shaking my head I stubbed the cigarette out and headed back up toward that mule riding dentist.

Driving along Highway 31 and the smoking guilt got to be too much. I remembered what a client had said to me once.

You’re a vegetarian but you smoke??[2]

I stopped at another gas station and threw the pack of 19 cigarettes in the closest garbage can. Then I roared away in the Cube like a bear shot in the neck with a goat tranquilizer.

[…Interlude of tooth song and dance…]

While driving back home the fiery nicotine addiction kicked back in. My body was withdrawing and my mind going berserk. When I get in this spot, frantic desperation will kick my ass every single time.

Yes, of course, I did stop back at that second gas station and did dug the 19 pack back outta the trash.[3] I was literally digging in the garbage can. Of a public place. In broad daylight. In a smoke finding delirium. With my mouth half numb from all the dentistry prodding and poking.

People were looking at me like I was a red-assed baboon, masturbating[4] at the zoo while baring his teeth as a warning.

Keep the children away from him!

If you’ve ever committed this act of communal cigarette larceny you’re not alone.

Peeps, that’s the end of this story. Happy Wednesday!

#smokersunite #socialproblems #diariespodcast


  1. Please note: a bear’s thick coat protects them from being stung. They have little consequence for their actions.

  2. It wasn’t a question. It was a statement of disappointment.

  3. Addicts know no shame. Nicotine is one of the most powerful drugs, chemicals, bitches I’ve ever encountered.

  4. Please note: I was fully dressed.

9 comments

Monohon · Feb 21, 2018 at 1:25 pm

I have radiation therapy I don’t want to be one of those older then I am Fuckers still smoking I start on the 27th!

tcr! tcr! · Feb 21, 2018 at 2:41 pm

Good luck!!

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jenkins_arts · Feb 21, 2018 at 1:31 pm

Nicotine is at the top of the list of addictive drugs.

tcr! tcr! · Feb 21, 2018 at 2:41 pm

I believe it.

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JJ · Feb 21, 2018 at 5:26 pm

Hmmmmm?!. I was just talking to someone this afternoon @ how I quit. How weird? My phone ( or you ) must be listening to me again. 😂

jimi hindrance experience jimi hindrance experience · Feb 22, 2018 at 4:43 am

He eavesdrops on everybody!

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jimi hindrance experience jimi hindrance experience · Feb 22, 2018 at 4:40 am

I know people who quit shooting meth and quit drinking whisky who can’t quit smoking. Oddly enough, I don’t have first hand experience with this drug. I never met a drug I didn’t like with the exception of tobacco. I must be allergic to it. Another…See More

tcr! tcr! · Feb 22, 2018 at 8:53 am

I remember Goth Sean Penn but I don’t remember the tobacco interlude. I’ll have to research.

tcr! tcr! · Feb 22, 2018 at 8:54 am

Smoking is definitely an ash-y, cough-y type of love affair. Talking (and smelling) like Tom Waits is a requirement.

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Blue/purple squid ashtray.jpg

tcr! · Mar 21, 2016 at 7:06 pm

Blue purple squid ashtray

This is the only ashtray I have left even though I don’t smoke (mostly) anymore.

#photos #tentacles #smokersunite

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Mar 24th, 2015 at 9:26:01 am

tcr! · Mar 24, 2015 at 9:26 am

When I smoke, it’s generally because I’m in withdrawal.

This morning I smoked because I’m a smoker.

I hate that.

#smokersunite #confessional

2 comments

jimi hindrance experience jimi hindrance experience · Mar 24, 2015 at 3:50 pm

you have my support. anything i can say or do? hang in there.

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tcr! tcr! · Mar 25, 2015 at 10:28 am

It’s all good. I started feeling sick because I smoke too much. Because I’m a smoker.

Thanks though!

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Dec 17th, 2014 at 12:19:50 pm

tcr! · Dec 17, 2014 at 12:19 pm

fatal attraction

#smokersunite #coffee

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Dec 19th, 2013 at 1:36:48 pm

tcr! · Dec 19, 2013 at 1:36 pm

About this time every work day I start to go into nicotine withdrawals. No idea why since I maintain the status quo with intake.

#confessional #smokersunite

2 comments

jimi hindrance experience jimi hindrance experience · Dec 21, 2013 at 2:55 am

From the DSM IV, you're probably experiencing 305.10.
The Diagnostic Service Manual is a list of codes used in health care to bill the insurance companies. The IV simply means it's the 4th time they've revised it.
You also may be suffering from 292.12, PCP intoxication.
Or, 302.4, Exhibitionism.
Or you could have 307.7, Encopresis, which is an unhealthy relationship with your poop.
My favorite, but a long-shot at what is ailing you, is 312.34, Intermittent Explosive Disorder, which is what it sounds like: Rage-o-holic complete with breaking stuff.
You may also be afflicted with 312.39, a condition that includes pulling your hair out and eating it.
I'm still suffering from ODD. I didn't make it up. Oppositional Defiant DIsorder (ODD) is what it sounds like.
Good luck to you sir, and no penguins were harmed in the production of this missive.

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tcr! tcr! · Dec 21, 2013 at 4:12 pm

I apply 313.23 during Republican encounters unless they're dressed in Middle-earth garb.

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