Audio (MP3): 20180116 - I've always been at war with machine X
I can only feel hurt and blame someone else for so long.
And after that time is over I have to either say something or let it go. I don’t have the right to hold onto my hurt for years if I’m not gonna do anything about it. Not doing anything other than hurting, well, it’s not fair to the other person and it’s definitely not fair to me.
Living with that hurt keeps me from being the best me that I can be. That hurt stands in the way of all of my relationships.
There’s a lot to be said for saying something out loud. When things are up in my head I can’t make sense of them. My thoughts are like a whirlpool or tornado. Or both. They’re just going around and around and they don’t make any sense. My emotions are all muddy and I can’t get the clarity to know up from down.
I don’t sit with things very long in the here-and-now because I’ve learned that life lesson. That I’m only going to be hurting myself and most likely innocent bystanders by not speaking up.
Also, I never write something in hopes that someone else will read it. That misses the point of everything I just wrote.
Momma J · Jan 16, 2018 at 7:38 pm
You are a deep thinker. You think about things that I don’t even think to think about!
tcr! · Jan 16, 2018 at 7:53 pm
And it’s never my idea to think of them.
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Monohon · Jan 17, 2018 at 12:14 pm
I wish you only peace and happiness you have a great family and what seems like a great life look to the future and try not to dwell on the past I know it’s hard but you can do this if you ever need to talk contact me on messenger for my phone number!
tcr! · Jan 17, 2018 at 7:47 pm
Thank you!! This was actually something I wrote 2-3 months ago but didn’t feel like posting it at the time! But that you, you’ve always been a good guy, a good friend.
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Ryan Waters · Jan 18, 2018 at 1:37 pm
Oh my! I really just need to say “ditto and thanks, Travis- I really needed to read and ponder your words!”
tcr! · Jan 19, 2018 at 9:51 am
Thank you! And happy Friday!
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