Gas pump: Will you be paying with a credit or debit card?

Me: Credit.

Me pushes “credit card” button and inserts credit card.

Gas pump: Is this a debit or card?

Me: It’s a credit card… 🙄

Me pushes “credit card” button again.

Gas pump: Would you like to use a rewards card?

Me: No, I’ve said CREDIT FUCKING CARD at least fifty times.

Me pushes “no” button.

Gas pump: Would you like to buy a car wash?

Me: What I’d like to do is rip your fucking arm hose off and club you over the head with it. Who do I have to blow to get some fucking gas around here?

Me thumb punches “no” button again.

Gas pump: Please remove the nozzle, select grade…

Me: One more word fucktard and you’ll end up on a Jawa sand crawler with the rest of the robotic rejects.

Me pumps gas while thinking that I do try really, really hard to be a good person, and yet the world continues to push my buttons and bombard me with bullshits. We now live in a place where the machines can be just as obnoxious as people.

Gas pump: Would you like a reciept?

Me: Haha! Not this time my little 8-bit terminal friend. I’ll be answering no more questions from the likes of you. You can sit there in solitude with your query ignored as I drive off into a dual sunset, dreaming of a princess whose hands are never cold.

#allislost #lettherebehope