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I bought a pack of cigarettes last night

tcr! · Aug 21, 2016 at 10:21 pm

I hadn’t boughten a pack in maybe over six months. My ecig fits the bill. Mostly.

Something felt missing as I was making my way home. Not like a fundamental thing but more a minor detail, a bow on a present, a knot on a shoe. A sentence without a period.

Regardless of the horrible taste, the everywhere ashes, the smoke in my eyes — smoking feels right. The cigarette felt right in my hand. It felt right on my lips. The smoke felt right in my lungs. I felt right with the world.

And that feeling of “right” terrorizes alcoholics and addicts their whole lives once they’ve tapped into it.

There’s no going back. Something will always feel missing because we know.

skull matchbook

#alcoholism #cigarettes

jimi hindrance experience jimi hindrance experience · Aug 22, 2016 at 1:10 pm

Jaheezius Henry Christ. On a Pogo Stick.

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tcr! tcr! · Aug 22, 2016 at 5:58 pm

I’m not sure if that’s good or bad. 😀

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jimi hindrance experience jimi hindrance experience · Aug 23, 2016 at 1:26 am

it is strongly identifying with, IE: “I KNOW”. it isn’t good or bad. fill-in-the-blank is a disease. we didn’t ask for it. etc. in other news: ELO doesn’t like the feeling of narcotics. i was talking to a dr. who only uses his first name and he told me that blank per cent of the population enjoys alcohol, and others don’t. blank per cent of the population enjoys (experiences the effects of as pleasureable) marijuana. and the per cent goes up exponentially for opiates and cocaine. myself? i felt left out a time or two and tried to like tobacco. it makes me deathly ill. i feel nausea and my head spins. i strongly enjoy the feeling of opiates and marijuana. i can usually stand the effects of alcohol. i love sugar and i can eat my weight in shreeump. (my cousins from the gulf coast said this and i was profoundly tickled.) :}

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jimi hindrance experience jimi hindrance experience · Aug 23, 2016 at 3:26 am

tcrbang! contest: i’ve boughten into the whole concept and i’ve gotten good at it. ~~~~ :)

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jimi hindrance experience jimi hindrance experience · Aug 23, 2016 at 5:35 am

and on another plane, the skull looks exactly like me. take a look at me and my little brother don. now just imagine that not only are the whiskas not there, but neither is the fat, skin, and muscle. or the fate. i gave up early, it’s true, but gravity has won. don is 13 months younger than me. he’s got 2 kids and one grandchild. i got 2 cats and a pernicious…case of arthritis. i am at least an inch taller than don but you’d never know it anymore. like the knights of columbus and those silly red capes, i been itching to use pernicious in a goddam sentence. and you know how i love my elipsi…

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