After some years of inactivity the company came to my house.  Ever efficient, they let themselves in and were in the middle of tidying my private files when i came home. 

“Do you know why we’re here?”

Seemingly unfamiliar with the willing and forthright, they asked me to elaborate.

“I suppose someone faraway has been behaving awful, and you want me to go blow their brains out.”

I had exhausted their patience.  They wanted to know if I was physically able.  I reckoned I could still pull a trigger.  

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Next up was an endless series of tests to determine if I was of sound mind.  They wanted to make sure I wasn’t crazy or of low moral character.  I assured them I was perfectly willing to murder strangers for inscrutable reasons.  Again. 

I was allowed to wait in a private room for 2 months while they thought it over.

I have always been puzzled by my employer.