I don’t know how it is that I still put on my shirt backwards. I get one on, something feels uncomfortable, and then I look down and see a tag below my chin.
What the fuck? Am I five?
I pull my arms out and then do the straitjacket maneuver to spin it around proper. Next thing I know I’m on a dolly and Senator Martin is questioning me about her daughter.
This is why I have a hard time even getting out of bed in the morning
Oh, and Senator, just one more thing. Love your suit.